My Son...

There was this great guy holding the highest post in the government, and he was a believer. Sadly, his wealth, popularity, power and unmatched wisdom drew him away from the Lord. Later in life he was plagued with guilt. Every time he saw youngsters wasting their ife, bitter memories of past wrongs would well up in him, and he would long to reach out to warn them. So he resolved to draw boundaries in black and white for youth. This is what we read in his famous book called Proverbs, a string of “My son...” There are eight such warnings he as a Preacher wanted to impress upon youth.

1. Son and Seniors

“My son, keep your father’s commands and do not forsake your mother’s teaching...For these commands are a lamp, this teaching is a light, and the corrections of discipline are the way of life” (6:20-23).

It is indeed hard when parents keep driving you to do this and do that, not to do this and not to do that. It is irritating when they discipline you. You feel like shouting back when they tell you to switch off the light to save electricity or put their foot down when you want to attend a midnight party. But the Bible calls these disciplines as the way of life. Reading the Bible alone simply remains head knowledge, but parents impart the experience of life to us.

Another lesson emerges from the familiar passage in Ephesians 6: 1-4: “Children obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. Honour your father and mother...Fathers, do not exasperate your children.”

Paul deliberately adds, “in the Lord.” This should not be used as a cloak for choosey obedience but a son must be able to discern whether his parents’ directions are pleasing to the Lord.

A twelve year old Jewish boy was considered to enter adulthood and it was to such a ceremony that Jesus went with His parents. After the festival Jesus did not think it necessary to get permission from His parents to stay back. When His parents were offended, He simply asked them, “Why were you searching for Me? Didn’t you know I had to be in My Father’s house?” (Lk 2:49). Jesus was absolutely sure He was doing the will of God and He was doubly sure that His parents would never let Him stay back in Jerusalem. But the more important thing we read in verse 51 is, “Then He went down to Nazareth with them and was obedient to them.”

There is a delicate margin here. At age twelve when you start maturing, you must learn to take up responsibilities one by one on your shoulders. You  must be able to take some simple decisions all by yourself. It is sure to shock and offend your parents. But then you are admonished to “honour” your parents. So speak to them respectfully when you convey your decision. Sit and discuss with them your point of view and request them to allow you to go ahead. You can tell them something like, “Dear Mummy and Daddy, I prayed about this matter and I feel God wants me to do this. Though you feel otherwise let me go ahead and do this. Even if I make a mistake in taking this decision, I will learn a valuable lesson for future decision-making. I want you to stand by me even if I go wrong.” This way as you grow older and older you will be able to take more and more decisions concerning your life, under your parents’ guidance till the day when you will be on your own feet.

2. Son and Sinners

“My son, if sinners entice you, do not give in to them...my son, do not go along with them, do not set foot on their paths” (1:10-15).

Everywhere you turn there are sinners, be it school, college, home or workspot. A man called Korah invited two others to join him. They in turn got 250 influential guys to join them. They challenged God’s leaders, Moses and Aaron that they had bossed over the people, they had brought them out of Egypt flowing with milk and honey, they had not given them what they really promised, they cheated, etc, etc. Moses warned the people to step back from the wicked men, lest they also be swept away. The earth split apart and swallowed them (Num 16:1,2,3,12,13,14,26).

Is there a Korah near you? Move away. Don’t have anything to do with him, lest you also suffer as a partner to his wicked plots.

3. Son and Scriptures

“My son, do not forget my teaching, but keep my commandments in your heart...pay attention to what I say, listen closely...store, guard my teachings as the apple of your eye” (3:1; 4:20; 7:1,2).

So much emphasis is placed on our study of the Scriptures. The natural mind runs through the Bible.

But we must apply the brakes at every verse, re-read, re-re-read to understand what is written there. Ask questions from that verse and answer them. This is one simple way to store up what you read. Can anybody touch the apple of your eye? But we allow our daily Scripture reading to be snatched away by the Evil One as soon as it is sown. Learn the habit of counting. Take for example the signs of Second Coming. We all know it. vaguely. But when you read Matthew 24:5-12, number the signs. Close your Bible and try to recite the signs till you get all the ten. Put a heading in your Bible notebook as Ten Signs of Second Coming and write them down. That will stay in your heart longer and deeper. Count whenever possible.

When you listen to sermons, take notes. Simply listening will vanish into thin air. Writing it down will help you concentrate on the sermon. If it is a useful one, later on you can read it again.

The Preacher warns, “Stop listening to instruction that causes you to err from the words of knowledge” (19:27). Unless you are thorough with the teaching of the Word of God you will easily be led astray. So apply your mind and study the Scriptures. You should also bring yourself under the tutelage of a good Bible teacher, who correctly handles the Word of truth to have a good foundation laid down.

4. Son and Scourging

“My son, do not despise the Lord’s discipline and do not resent His rebuke, because the Lord disciplines those He loves, as a father the son he delights in” (3:11,12).

Trials and chastisement in life are proof that God loves you as a father loves his son. Many youth are confused when they go through failures and hardships. They look at their ungodly peers and wonder why they suffer as children of an all-powerful God. If they are successful in all that they do, if they don’t get any diseases, if..:if..,if, then will not peers know their God IS the greatest? But, God’s ways are different.

Turn to 1 Corinthians, Chapter 11 and verse 32. “When we are being judged by the Lord, we are being disciplined so that we will not be condemned with the world.” A day will come, a terrible day when the world and all the wicked people will be condemned. But we who are punished, chastised, whipped, disciplined here will escape that horror. Which would you prefer? — to be punished here or to be condemned there? Be encouraged. Let not your heart fail when you face discouraging situations. The Lord is tapping you on your shoulder to get your attention.

5. Son and Sagacity

“My son, if your heart is wise, then my heart will be glad; ..always be zealous for the fear of the Lord. There is surely a future hope for you, and your hope will not be cut off ” (23:15,18). “My son...know also that wisdom is sweet to your soul; if you find it, there is a future hope for you, and your hope will not be cut off ” (24:13,14).

Youthhood is a time of confusion and uncertainty. You cannot guess what will become of you. The fear and uncertainty of future looms large over you like an ominous shadow. You know that the fear of the Lord iswisdom. But that doesn’t seem to payoff. You seem to have no talent, no gift. You are not shining in studies, neither in your job. Marriage prospects seems dim. So many other such things seem to extinguish your hopes.

 Here Solomon says, “Never mind. Don’t look at sinners. Keep on. Keep at it. Hold on to the fear of God, which is wisdom, whether you seem to profit by it or not. There is surely a bright future for you.” Many started life wisely but are now fallen by the wayside.

Life may seem a dull routine, but let the fear of God guide you step by step. Ultimately you will be rewarded.

6. Son and Sex

“Why be captivated, my son, by an adultress? Why embrace the bosom of another man’s wife?” (5:20).

Curiosity is human nature. Youth want to know all about sex and experience it first hand. Some youth fear that they may not be able to consummate the marriage if they do not know what to do. Sometimes this fear drives them to a harlot. Some others doubt their manliness and desire to test it before marriage. The call of sex to physical experience is relentless. Boys and girls meet inviting eyes everywhere.

The Bible draws certain boundaries. God’s law forbids sex before marriage as sin. Entering marriage not knowing everything about sex is a beautiful testimony. Actually God has designed it so that man and woman start learning about sex from the scratch after marriage. You have a lifetime to learn!

“My son, give me your heart, and let your eyes keep to my ways, for a prostitute is a deep pit and a wayward wife is a narrow well. Like a bandit she lies in wait, and multiplies the unfaithful among men” (23:26-28). There is no safe journey back, once you strike it out with an immoral person. Either you end your race there or you return a damaged person. “My son...do not spend your strength on women, your vigour on those who ruin kings” (31:2,3). Your strength and vigour is related in some way to the plurality of persons you have sex with. God’s rule is one man for one woman. More than that endangers your health.

What Jesus said about committing adultery by looking at a woman lustfully confuses many youth. An unmarried person should not look at a married person lustfully. Neither should he look at an unmarried person with the intentions or plans to have sex. Only that is a lustful look. The normal emotion a boy or a girl experiences when he/she looks at the opposite sex is not lust. It is these emotions, when properly handled, that guide them to the right life partner.

7. Son and Surfeiting

“Listen, my son... Do not join those who drink too much wine or gorge themselves on meat, for drunkards and gluttons become poor” (23:19-21).

It is important for youth to develop healthy eating habits so as to maintain the temple of God well. Fast once or twice a week. Exercise self-control over food. Drunkards and gluttons spend their money on wine and food and then for medical expenses and become poor. Friends who take you to restaurants frequently introduce bad habits to you which may be difficult to shed later on. Eat three home-cooked meals and avoid junk food.

A simple principle to follow is to cut back on oil and sugar and to exercise vigorously every day through outdoor games, whether boys or girls. Don’t go in for a two-wheeler or four-wheeler as long as possible. Walking, bi-cycling and public transport are best for your age.

8. Son and Superiors

“Fear the Lord and the king, my son” (24:21).

Youth must work on becoming good citizens of the country. You must train yourself to obey government orders and rules. Jesus believed in paying to Caesar that which belonged to Caesar (Mt 22:21).

Follow traffic rules. Never drive without a licence.  Don’t cross the red light even though the road may be deserted. Pay extra when you carry excess luggage. Don’t travel without valid ticket or enter the railway station without a platform ticket, hoping to escape. You always read in the train toilets, “Do not use the toilet in stations,” but conveniently use them to the inconvenience of others. Don’t pull the chain and jump and run away when the train stops. Avoid spitting everywhere. Don’t urinate outside your school premises by the wayside. Throw rubbish in trash bins only. Don’t dirty walls with your grafitti. Develop civic sense. You must be a total Christian (Rom 13:1-7).

The counsel of Solomon is valuable because he learnt from life. That’s why his counsel is practical. He endearingly calls you “My son.” Follow his counsel as obeying a father.

  Articles (Tamil)

   Updated
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      Oct 14, 2024
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      Mar 10, 2024
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  Address for Correspondence Contributions

Dr. Lilian Stanley
13 Church Colony
Vellore 632006, India
 +91 9843511943
  lilianstanley@gmail.com

Blessing Youth Mission

Blessing Youth Mission
13 Church Colony
Vellore 632006, India
 +91-416-2242943, +91-416-2248943
  hq@bymonline.org
  www.bymonline.org

For Donation & Contributions...

Home & NRE donors

Name: Blessing Youth Mission
Account Type: Current Account
A/c No.: 37268642054
Bank: State Bank of India
Branch: Siruthozhil,Vellore - 632 006
IFSC No.: SBIN0007274

Gulf Donors

A/c Name: T.Dickson Daniel Moses
Account Type: Saving Account
A/c No.: 35374362080
Bank: State Bank of India
Branch: Siruthozhil,Vellore - 632 006
IFSF: SBIN0007274

Click here for more options

  Blessing Literature Centre

To buy books written by Dr. Lilian Stanley, kindly reach to us in the follwing address

Blessing Literature Centre
21/11 West Coovam River Road,
Chintadripet,
Chennai 600 002, India.
 +91-44-28450411, 8806270699
  blc@bymonline.org

  Articles (Tamil)

   Updated
  •   என் அண்ணா!
      Oct 14, 2024
    நான் இயேசுவின் தம்பி யாக்கோபு. ஏழை குடும்பத்தில், நாசரேத் என்னும் ஊரில் பிறந்த நாங்கள் ஐந்து சகோதரர் மற்றும் சகோதரிகள். more...
  •   இறைவார்த்தையின் வல்லமை!.
      Mar 10, 2024
    நாம் ஜெபிக்கவேண்டும்தான். அனால் இரன்டு காரணங்களுக்காக நாம் சோதிக்கப்படும்படி தேவன் அனுமதிக்கிறார் more...
  •   நான் குழந்தை இயேசு!.
      Jan 29, 2024
    அப்பாவின் கவலை தோய்ந்த முகம் பூலோகத்தையே உற்று நோக்கி கொண்டிருந்ததை கவனித்தேன் more...

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My Son...

There was this great guy holding the highest post in the government, and he was a believer. Sadly, his wealth, popularity, power and unmatched wisdom drew him away from the Lord. Later in life he was plagued with guilt. Every time he saw youngsters wasting their ife, bitter memories of past wrongs would well up in him, and he would long to reach out to warn them. So he resolved to draw boundaries in black and white for youth. This is what we read in his famous book called Proverbs, a string of “My son...” There are eight such warnings he as a Preacher wanted to impress upon youth.

1. Son and Seniors

“My son, keep your father’s commands and do not forsake your mother’s teaching...For these commands are a lamp, this teaching is a light, and the corrections of discipline are the way of life” (6:20-23).

It is indeed hard when parents keep driving you to do this and do that, not to do this and not to do that. It is irritating when they discipline you. You feel like shouting back when they tell you to switch off the light to save electricity or put their foot down when you want to attend a midnight party. But the Bible calls these disciplines as the way of life. Reading the Bible alone simply remains head knowledge, but parents impart the experience of life to us.

Another lesson emerges from the familiar passage in Ephesians 6: 1-4: “Children obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. Honour your father and mother...Fathers, do not exasperate your children.”

Paul deliberately adds, “in the Lord.” This should not be used as a cloak for choosey obedience but a son must be able to discern whether his parents’ directions are pleasing to the Lord.

A twelve year old Jewish boy was considered to enter adulthood and it was to such a ceremony that Jesus went with His parents. After the festival Jesus did not think it necessary to get permission from His parents to stay back. When His parents were offended, He simply asked them, “Why were you searching for Me? Didn’t you know I had to be in My Father’s house?” (Lk 2:49). Jesus was absolutely sure He was doing the will of God and He was doubly sure that His parents would never let Him stay back in Jerusalem. But the more important thing we read in verse 51 is, “Then He went down to Nazareth with them and was obedient to them.”

There is a delicate margin here. At age twelve when you start maturing, you must learn to take up responsibilities one by one on your shoulders. You  must be able to take some simple decisions all by yourself. It is sure to shock and offend your parents. But then you are admonished to “honour” your parents. So speak to them respectfully when you convey your decision. Sit and discuss with them your point of view and request them to allow you to go ahead. You can tell them something like, “Dear Mummy and Daddy, I prayed about this matter and I feel God wants me to do this. Though you feel otherwise let me go ahead and do this. Even if I make a mistake in taking this decision, I will learn a valuable lesson for future decision-making. I want you to stand by me even if I go wrong.” This way as you grow older and older you will be able to take more and more decisions concerning your life, under your parents’ guidance till the day when you will be on your own feet.

2. Son and Sinners

“My son, if sinners entice you, do not give in to them...my son, do not go along with them, do not set foot on their paths” (1:10-15).

Everywhere you turn there are sinners, be it school, college, home or workspot. A man called Korah invited two others to join him. They in turn got 250 influential guys to join them. They challenged God’s leaders, Moses and Aaron that they had bossed over the people, they had brought them out of Egypt flowing with milk and honey, they had not given them what they really promised, they cheated, etc, etc. Moses warned the people to step back from the wicked men, lest they also be swept away. The earth split apart and swallowed them (Num 16:1,2,3,12,13,14,26).

Is there a Korah near you? Move away. Don’t have anything to do with him, lest you also suffer as a partner to his wicked plots.

3. Son and Scriptures

“My son, do not forget my teaching, but keep my commandments in your heart...pay attention to what I say, listen closely...store, guard my teachings as the apple of your eye” (3:1; 4:20; 7:1,2).

So much emphasis is placed on our study of the Scriptures. The natural mind runs through the Bible.

But we must apply the brakes at every verse, re-read, re-re-read to understand what is written there. Ask questions from that verse and answer them. This is one simple way to store up what you read. Can anybody touch the apple of your eye? But we allow our daily Scripture reading to be snatched away by the Evil One as soon as it is sown. Learn the habit of counting. Take for example the signs of Second Coming. We all know it. vaguely. But when you read Matthew 24:5-12, number the signs. Close your Bible and try to recite the signs till you get all the ten. Put a heading in your Bible notebook as Ten Signs of Second Coming and write them down. That will stay in your heart longer and deeper. Count whenever possible.

When you listen to sermons, take notes. Simply listening will vanish into thin air. Writing it down will help you concentrate on the sermon. If it is a useful one, later on you can read it again.

The Preacher warns, “Stop listening to instruction that causes you to err from the words of knowledge” (19:27). Unless you are thorough with the teaching of the Word of God you will easily be led astray. So apply your mind and study the Scriptures. You should also bring yourself under the tutelage of a good Bible teacher, who correctly handles the Word of truth to have a good foundation laid down.

4. Son and Scourging

“My son, do not despise the Lord’s discipline and do not resent His rebuke, because the Lord disciplines those He loves, as a father the son he delights in” (3:11,12).

Trials and chastisement in life are proof that God loves you as a father loves his son. Many youth are confused when they go through failures and hardships. They look at their ungodly peers and wonder why they suffer as children of an all-powerful God. If they are successful in all that they do, if they don’t get any diseases, if..:if..,if, then will not peers know their God IS the greatest? But, God’s ways are different.

Turn to 1 Corinthians, Chapter 11 and verse 32. “When we are being judged by the Lord, we are being disciplined so that we will not be condemned with the world.” A day will come, a terrible day when the world and all the wicked people will be condemned. But we who are punished, chastised, whipped, disciplined here will escape that horror. Which would you prefer? — to be punished here or to be condemned there? Be encouraged. Let not your heart fail when you face discouraging situations. The Lord is tapping you on your shoulder to get your attention.

5. Son and Sagacity

“My son, if your heart is wise, then my heart will be glad; ..always be zealous for the fear of the Lord. There is surely a future hope for you, and your hope will not be cut off ” (23:15,18). “My son...know also that wisdom is sweet to your soul; if you find it, there is a future hope for you, and your hope will not be cut off ” (24:13,14).

Youthhood is a time of confusion and uncertainty. You cannot guess what will become of you. The fear and uncertainty of future looms large over you like an ominous shadow. You know that the fear of the Lord iswisdom. But that doesn’t seem to payoff. You seem to have no talent, no gift. You are not shining in studies, neither in your job. Marriage prospects seems dim. So many other such things seem to extinguish your hopes.

 Here Solomon says, “Never mind. Don’t look at sinners. Keep on. Keep at it. Hold on to the fear of God, which is wisdom, whether you seem to profit by it or not. There is surely a bright future for you.” Many started life wisely but are now fallen by the wayside.

Life may seem a dull routine, but let the fear of God guide you step by step. Ultimately you will be rewarded.

6. Son and Sex

“Why be captivated, my son, by an adultress? Why embrace the bosom of another man’s wife?” (5:20).

Curiosity is human nature. Youth want to know all about sex and experience it first hand. Some youth fear that they may not be able to consummate the marriage if they do not know what to do. Sometimes this fear drives them to a harlot. Some others doubt their manliness and desire to test it before marriage. The call of sex to physical experience is relentless. Boys and girls meet inviting eyes everywhere.

The Bible draws certain boundaries. God’s law forbids sex before marriage as sin. Entering marriage not knowing everything about sex is a beautiful testimony. Actually God has designed it so that man and woman start learning about sex from the scratch after marriage. You have a lifetime to learn!

“My son, give me your heart, and let your eyes keep to my ways, for a prostitute is a deep pit and a wayward wife is a narrow well. Like a bandit she lies in wait, and multiplies the unfaithful among men” (23:26-28). There is no safe journey back, once you strike it out with an immoral person. Either you end your race there or you return a damaged person. “My son...do not spend your strength on women, your vigour on those who ruin kings” (31:2,3). Your strength and vigour is related in some way to the plurality of persons you have sex with. God’s rule is one man for one woman. More than that endangers your health.

What Jesus said about committing adultery by looking at a woman lustfully confuses many youth. An unmarried person should not look at a married person lustfully. Neither should he look at an unmarried person with the intentions or plans to have sex. Only that is a lustful look. The normal emotion a boy or a girl experiences when he/she looks at the opposite sex is not lust. It is these emotions, when properly handled, that guide them to the right life partner.

7. Son and Surfeiting

“Listen, my son... Do not join those who drink too much wine or gorge themselves on meat, for drunkards and gluttons become poor” (23:19-21).

It is important for youth to develop healthy eating habits so as to maintain the temple of God well. Fast once or twice a week. Exercise self-control over food. Drunkards and gluttons spend their money on wine and food and then for medical expenses and become poor. Friends who take you to restaurants frequently introduce bad habits to you which may be difficult to shed later on. Eat three home-cooked meals and avoid junk food.

A simple principle to follow is to cut back on oil and sugar and to exercise vigorously every day through outdoor games, whether boys or girls. Don’t go in for a two-wheeler or four-wheeler as long as possible. Walking, bi-cycling and public transport are best for your age.

8. Son and Superiors

“Fear the Lord and the king, my son” (24:21).

Youth must work on becoming good citizens of the country. You must train yourself to obey government orders and rules. Jesus believed in paying to Caesar that which belonged to Caesar (Mt 22:21).

Follow traffic rules. Never drive without a licence.  Don’t cross the red light even though the road may be deserted. Pay extra when you carry excess luggage. Don’t travel without valid ticket or enter the railway station without a platform ticket, hoping to escape. You always read in the train toilets, “Do not use the toilet in stations,” but conveniently use them to the inconvenience of others. Don’t pull the chain and jump and run away when the train stops. Avoid spitting everywhere. Don’t urinate outside your school premises by the wayside. Throw rubbish in trash bins only. Don’t dirty walls with your grafitti. Develop civic sense. You must be a total Christian (Rom 13:1-7).

The counsel of Solomon is valuable because he learnt from life. That’s why his counsel is practical. He endearingly calls you “My son.” Follow his counsel as obeying a father.

  Address for Correspondence Contributions

Dr. Lilian Stanley
13 Church Colony
Vellore 632006, India
 +91 9843511943
  lilianstanley@gmail.com

Blessing Youth Mission

Blessing Youth Mission
13 Church Colony
Vellore 632006, India
 +91-416-2242943, +91-416-2248943
  hq@bymonline.org
  www.bymonline.org

For Donation & Contributions...

Home & NRE donors

Name: Blessing Youth Mission
Account Type: Current Account
A/c No.: 37268642054
Bank: State Bank of India
Branch: Siruthozhil,Vellore - 632 006
IFSC No.: SBIN0007274

Gulf Donors

A/c Name: T.Dickson Daniel Moses
Account Type: Saving Account
A/c No.: 35374362080
Bank: State Bank of India
Branch: Siruthozhil,Vellore - 632 006
IFSF: SBIN0007274

Click here for more options

  Blessing Literature Centre

To buy books written by Dr. Lilian Stanley, kindly reach to us in the follwing address

Blessing Literature Centre
21/11 West Coovam River Road,
Chintadripet,
Chennai 600 002, India.
 +91-44-28450411, Mob:8806270699
  blc@bymonline.org