The fruit called Peace
Reading: Romans 15:1-9
"Let us therefore make every effort to do what leads to peace" (Rom 14:19)
Try the following strategies to enjoy peaceful relationships
6. Accept unconditionally!
Psychologists speak of four basic temperaments. Let’s not worry about it. Suffice is to know each person is different physically, mentally, spiritually and temperamentally. It is difficult to adjust to another person unless you give a generous allowance to her temperament. Remove ‘if’ from your vocabulary as far as relationship is concerned. "If she is not so sensitive," "If she is not so dumb," "If she were not so talkative," "If ... If ... If ..." There is no end to the list. But turn the ‘If’ inward and say, "If I am not so sensitive ... If ... If ... If." There you are, a person easy to live with. Let, "Whoever-comes-to-Me-I-will-nevercast-out" be our spirit! Give a good allowance to the younger. You would have acted much the same way when you were her age.
7. Listen intently!
How often do your wits go woolgathering while someone is talking to you? Let her who has ears listen! How often we fail to use our ears! The world is need of listeners. Parents who wail, "Our child never listens to us," try listening. What is listening? It is giving undivided attention to the person. Do you do that? Or do you listen, doing your own work or eyes on the TV screen or feet shuffling away? Listen with eyes focussed on the person, with facial and verbal expressions. Listening relieves more than half the pain of sufferers. It gives enthusiasm to a cheerful talker and encourages a feeble, fearful person.
8. Criticise minimally!
Criticism, even when enclosed in a blanket of love, stings. People have enough hurts in this world. Spare them. Avoid criticism at any cost. If it needs to be said, let it take some other form with an introduction of love and a conclusion of apology to minimize the unavoidable pain. An useful aid would be to stop and think, how you would have yourself to be dealt with in a situation worthy of criticism. Do thou likewise! Do no criticize from hearsay. Never allow a relationship to sour because somebody said something about her. Go, sit with her and have an open talk. More often you’ll find that the information you received was a lie or a half truth spoken without love. Clear it off with the concerned and leave with a warm handshake.
Dr. Lilian Stanley
13 Church Colony
Vellore 632006, India
+91 9843511943
lilianstanley@gmail.com
Blessing Youth Mission
13 Church Colony
Vellore 632006, India
+91-416-2242943, +91-416-2248943
hq@bymonline.org
www.bymonline.org
Click here for more options
To buy books written by Dr. Lilian Stanley, kindly reach to us in the follwing address
Blessing Literature Centre
21/11 West Coovam River Road,
Chintadripet,
Chennai 600 002, India.
+91-44-28450411, 8806270699
blc@bymonline.org
The fruit called Peace
Reading: Romans 15:1-9
"Let us therefore make every effort to do what leads to peace" (Rom 14:19)
Try the following strategies to enjoy peaceful relationships
6. Accept unconditionally!
Psychologists speak of four basic temperaments. Let’s not worry about it. Suffice is to know each person is different physically, mentally, spiritually and temperamentally. It is difficult to adjust to another person unless you give a generous allowance to her temperament. Remove ‘if’ from your vocabulary as far as relationship is concerned. "If she is not so sensitive," "If she is not so dumb," "If she were not so talkative," "If ... If ... If ..." There is no end to the list. But turn the ‘If’ inward and say, "If I am not so sensitive ... If ... If ... If." There you are, a person easy to live with. Let, "Whoever-comes-to-Me-I-will-nevercast-out" be our spirit! Give a good allowance to the younger. You would have acted much the same way when you were her age.
7. Listen intently!
How often do your wits go woolgathering while someone is talking to you? Let her who has ears listen! How often we fail to use our ears! The world is need of listeners. Parents who wail, "Our child never listens to us," try listening. What is listening? It is giving undivided attention to the person. Do you do that? Or do you listen, doing your own work or eyes on the TV screen or feet shuffling away? Listen with eyes focussed on the person, with facial and verbal expressions. Listening relieves more than half the pain of sufferers. It gives enthusiasm to a cheerful talker and encourages a feeble, fearful person.
8. Criticise minimally!
Criticism, even when enclosed in a blanket of love, stings. People have enough hurts in this world. Spare them. Avoid criticism at any cost. If it needs to be said, let it take some other form with an introduction of love and a conclusion of apology to minimize the unavoidable pain. An useful aid would be to stop and think, how you would have yourself to be dealt with in a situation worthy of criticism. Do thou likewise! Do no criticize from hearsay. Never allow a relationship to sour because somebody said something about her. Go, sit with her and have an open talk. More often you’ll find that the information you received was a lie or a half truth spoken without love. Clear it off with the concerned and leave with a warm handshake.
Dr. Lilian Stanley
13 Church Colony
Vellore 632006, India
+91 9843511943
lilianstanley@gmail.com
Blessing Youth Mission
13 Church Colony
Vellore 632006, India
+91-416-2242943, +91-416-2248943
hq@bymonline.org
www.bymonline.org
Click here for more options
To buy books written by Dr. Lilian Stanley, kindly reach to us in the follwing address
Blessing Literature Centre
21/11 West Coovam River Road,
Chintadripet,
Chennai 600 002, India.
+91-44-28450411, Mob:8806270699
blc@bymonline.org
