Honouring Parents

If a parent can testify of his child, "This is my beloved child in whom I am well pleased," we can safely conclude the child has done his best to honour his parents. Make this your aim. The commandment, "Honour your father and your mother" is repeated
eight times in the Bible. But we have rarely ever given thought to how exactly we can fulfill this commandment in our life. Of the ten commandments only two are associated with a promise and this is the first of the two. "Honour your father and mother,
which is the first commandment with a promise so that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth" (Eph 6:2,3). If you are facing many problems in life, if things are not going too well, if sickness threatens to cut short your
life unduly — why not try honouring your parents?

Obedience

The first aspect of honouring parents is obedience. A rebellious spirit will whisper into your ears that your parents do not understand you, you know better. Especially if you are an adolescent your parents seem hard task-masters, most unreasonable and
cruel. But remember they have atleast 25 years of experience over you. The Bible simply says you must "obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right" (Eph 6:1). If their demand is not against the Scriptures you must obey without a second thought.
Jesus was obedient to His parents (Lk 2:52).

"Listen, my son, to your father's instruction and do not forsake's your mother's teaching. They are a garland to grace your head and a chain to adorn your neck" (Prov 1:8,9).
Obedience is not easy. But remember Christ had to learn obedience through suffering (Heb 5:8). There is no record of a blessed person in the Bible, who did not obey his parents. Samson, Absalom, Eli's sons, all met with disastrous ends.

The olden day punishment for disobedience to parents was very severe. "If a man has a stubborn and rebellious son who will not obey the voice of his father or the voice of his mother, and who when they have chastened him, will not heed them, then all the
men of his city shall stone him to death with stones" (Dt 21:18-21). Do not think that God has relaxed His rules today. It is the grace of God that sustains you and teaches you to save you from destruction. Even the New Testament proclaims death to such.
"...they disobey their parents...Although they know God's righteous decree that those who do such things deserve death" (Rom 1:30-32).

There is an unusual testimony of obedience to parents in the 35th chapter of Jeremiah. Read it.

A good start for better obedience is (1) Do not question parents; (2) Never make them repeat a request; (3) Do it as soon as they say it so that the devil's tool of forgetfulness is defeated.

Respect

It is not true respect if you uphold them only till they write their will or only as long as you need their support. When they grow old and become dependent on you, still they command respect. "Stand up in the presence of the aged, show respect for the
elderly and revere your God" (Lev 19:32). Jesus reminded a ruler to


honour his parents (Lk 18:18,20). Even if you have lost the habit of showing respect to your parents it is never too late to cultivate it again. Some very good traditional ways of showing respect to parents are being washed away by the tides of time. May
Christian parents, teach their children to hold on to good traditions. "Listen to your father who begot you, and do not despise your mother when she is old" (Prov 23:22).

Help

There is no use trying to honour your parents without helping them in some way.Atamil proverb says that a child should understand the mind of the parent and give them a helping hand before they even ask. Is there a breach between you and your parents?Are
you finding ways of getting reconciled to them? Here is a suggestion to win their love. Just start helping them in odd jobs before their asking you. You will soon realise that it is a magic wand. "As a man spares his own son who serves him" (Mal 3:17).
It is not a shame to run errands or wash dishes or sweep the floor. Jesus helped his father in carpentry and became a carpenter Himself. David took vituals for his brothers in the army and Joseph to his brothers in the field. James and John helped their father not only in the interesting job of fishing but the boring one of mending the nets too. No wonder Jesus trusted them as His helpers! You are an arrow in your father's quiver, that is, a ready help in emergency to accomplish what he will (Psa 127:4,5). Helping will help you build a healthy relationship with your parents.


Studies

What has studies to do with honouring parents? Oh yes, it has a lot to do. When you fail in the examination your parents feel dishonoured. Why? "A foolish son brings grief to his father and bitterness to the mother who bore him" (Prov 17:25). "A foolish child is a father's ruin" (Prov 19:13). How many unfortunate parents are ruined because they spend a fortune on their children to have them educated and get back no dividends! Wisdom is something to be sought after and earned. "A wise man will hear and increase learning" (Prov 1:5). In this world you may not be respected without sound education. Your parents know the value of it. Give heed to them and strive to make them happy.

If you are better educated than your parents, do not be ashamed of them before others. Never forget that they were the instruments to shape your life. Let them rejoice and be proud of you. "A man who fathers a wise son rejoices in him. May your father
and mother rejoice; may she who gave you birth be joyful!" (Prov 23:24,25).

If you have finished your studies, take up a job and support them. It is an honour and help to the family. "He who gathers crops in summer is a prudent son, but he who sleeps during harvest is a disgraceful son" (Prov 10:5).

Godliness

"The father of the righteous child has great joy" (Prov 23:24). "A discerning son heeds instruction, but a companion of gluttons disgraces his father... Whoever robs their father or mother and says: 'It's not wrong,' is a partner to one who


destroys" (Prov 28:7, 24) Have your parents warned you not to company with so and so? Give heed to them. "Listen my son to your father's instruction...if sinners entice you, do not consent. If they say: Come with us..." (Prov 1:8-11). Many many parents
are disgraced by the evil friends of children. How many innocent children who break their relationship with parents are hunted and introduced to drugs by their friends! Be wise and save yourself.

Have you stolen your parent's money or material and quietened your conscience saying it was after all yours too. No, it was not yours. Please settle accounts with them today.

When righteousness becomes a costly affair the worldly wise devise some cheaper methods to honour their parents. Jesus simply whipped at such modern morals. "You say that if anyone declares that what might have been used to help their father or mother is
'devoted to God,' they are not to 'honour their father or mother' with it
... Hypocrites!" (Mt 15:4-7). Beloved, give to Caesar that which is Caesar's, give to God that which is God's and give to your parents that which is theirs. Neither Jesus nor His Father can tolerate such outright robbery.

Unity

Unity among the children is an honour to the parents. David being one of eight sons understood it very well. Therefore he sang, "Behold, how good and how pleasant it is for brothers to dwell together in unity! It is like the precious oil upon the head" -
head of the family! (Psa 133).

Job's children are a sweet model. They had regular get-togethers. The brothers would invite their sisters, not to fight over their property but just to have a jolly good time (Job 1:4). Times of get-together are very important for a happy family. Try to join the family at every meal.Adjust your schedule to join the family prayer and fun- time. The blessing of parents is to have their children like olive trees around the table (Psa 128:3).

Unity is the strength of the family. It is very costly; maintain it at all cost. The devil will try to sow seeds of discord among the children. Memorise Matthew 5:22-24; 18:15, 21,22. A placard on your table or a sticker 70x7 will be a helpful reminder.
Read the epistles of John again and again when you start practicing brotherly love. Build up broken relationships and thus anoint your parent's head with precious ointment.

Correction

It is very scriptural for your parents to rebuke or beat you. If they do not fulfil this responsibility today, tomorow you will go to hell. It is a safeguard for you from many of the dangers unknown to you in this world. The period you are with your
parents is a time of training for your future. "It is good for a man to bear the yoke while he is young" (Lam 3:27). A yoke is painful, heavy and does not allow you to go according to your will and pleasure; but it is safe. "There is a way that appears
to be right, but in the end it leads to death" (Prov 14:12). Their corrections are God's corrections. It can be compared to God's loving corrections. "The Lord disciplines those He loves, as a father the son He delights in" (Prov
3:12). So everytime your parents correct you, remember they delight in you. Hear the New Testament believers shout from the pages of Hebrews the beautiful testimony of their saintly life: "We have all had human fathers who disciplined us and we respected
them... No discipline seems pleasant at the time but painful;

later on, however it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it" (12:9-11).

Care

The right time to repay your parents is when they are at your mercy. Old Age Homes are the offsprings of our sin of neglect of parents. David was the youngest son and yet he took the responsibility on his shoulders (1 Sam 22:3,4). No wonder everything
went well with him and he lived long on this earth and died in a good old age! Jesus provided for His mother while on the cross. "Whoever robs their father and drives out their mother is a child who bring shame and disgrace" (Prov 19:26). "If a widow has
children or grandchildren, let them first learn their religious duty to their own family and make some returns to their parents; for this is acceptable in the sight of God... If anyone does not provide for his relatives and especially for his own family,
he has disowned the faith and is worse than an unbeliever" (1 Tim 5:4, 8 RSV).

Blessing

"Anyone who curses their father or mother is to be put to death. Because they have cursed their father or mother, their blood will be on their own head" (Lev 20:9). Does some unexplained darkness in life puzzle you, and you have no guidance? Does
darkness add to darkness and drive you desperate? "If someone curses their father or mother, their lamp will be snuffed out in pitch darkness" (Prov 20:20).

"There are those who curse their fathers, and do not bless their mothers... The eye that mocks a father, that scorns an aged mother, will be pecked by the ravens of the valley, will be eaten by the vultures" (Prov 30:11, 17). Beware of swearing. Even such expressions as "I hate you" or "the old man" or "the old woman" or even a scornful utterance of a sound are to be avoided. Never accuse your parents. Learn to accept "No's" politely though painful. Do not use bad words or raise your voice against them. You have no right to lift up your hands against them, or throw things on them. Learn to control your tongue and temper when you get angry.

Conclusion

Unruly children are a sign of the last days. "There will be terrible times in the last days. People will be ... disobedient to their parents" (2 Tim 3: 1-3). Think of the prodigal son. He learnt his lesson the hard way. He thought all that he needed in life was wine, women and song. How grossly he was mistaken! It was very late when he realised that he needed his parents — but not too late. Any sin may be forgiven. But some sins will leave an indelible scar in your life. Parents are your protection from such scars. They do not want you to face unpleasant surprises, shocks and tragedies in life. If you are far away from them run into their arms. Work till the day they testify: "This is our beloved child with whom we are well pleased." When a rich young ruler confessed that he observed the commandment, Honour your father and your mother. "Then Jesus, looking at him, loved him" (Mk 10:21). So may the love of God abide with you!

  Address for Correspondence Contributions

Dr. Lilian Stanley
13 Church Colony
Vellore 632006, India
 +91 9843511943
  lilianstanley@gmail.com

Blessing Youth Mission

Blessing Youth Mission
13 Church Colony
Vellore 632006, India
 +91-416-2242943, +91-416-2248943
  hq@bymonline.org
  www.bymonline.org

For Donation & Contributions...

Home & NRE donors

Name: Blessing Youth Mission
Account Type: Current Account
A/c No.: 37268642054
Bank: State Bank of India
Branch: Siruthozhil,Vellore - 632 006
IFSC No.: SBIN0007274

Overseas Donors

Name: Blessing Youth Mission
A/c No.: 1074703964
Bank: Central Bank of India
Branch: Vellore
IFSC No.: CBIN0280887
MICR Code: 000016000
SWIFT Code: CBININBBMDR

Gulf Donors

A/c Name: T.Dickson Daniel Moses
Account Type: Saving Account
A/c No.: 35374362080
Bank: State Bank of India
Branch: Siruthozhil,Vellore - 632 006
IFSF: SBIN0007274

Click here for more options

  Blessing Literature Centre

To buy books written by Dr. Lilian Stanley, kindly reach to us in the follwing address

Blessing Literature Centre
21/11 West Coovam River Road,
Chintadripet,
Chennai 600 002, India.
 +91-44-28450411
  blc@bymonline.org

Honouring Parents

If a parent can testify of his child, "This is my beloved child in whom I am well pleased," we can safely conclude the child has done his best to honour his parents. Make this your aim. The commandment, "Honour your father and your mother" is repeated
eight times in the Bible. But we have rarely ever given thought to how exactly we can fulfill this commandment in our life. Of the ten commandments only two are associated with a promise and this is the first of the two. "Honour your father and mother,
which is the first commandment with a promise so that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth" (Eph 6:2,3). If you are facing many problems in life, if things are not going too well, if sickness threatens to cut short your
life unduly — why not try honouring your parents?

Obedience

The first aspect of honouring parents is obedience. A rebellious spirit will whisper into your ears that your parents do not understand you, you know better. Especially if you are an adolescent your parents seem hard task-masters, most unreasonable and
cruel. But remember they have atleast 25 years of experience over you. The Bible simply says you must "obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right" (Eph 6:1). If their demand is not against the Scriptures you must obey without a second thought.
Jesus was obedient to His parents (Lk 2:52).

"Listen, my son, to your father's instruction and do not forsake's your mother's teaching. They are a garland to grace your head and a chain to adorn your neck" (Prov 1:8,9).
Obedience is not easy. But remember Christ had to learn obedience through suffering (Heb 5:8). There is no record of a blessed person in the Bible, who did not obey his parents. Samson, Absalom, Eli's sons, all met with disastrous ends.

The olden day punishment for disobedience to parents was very severe. "If a man has a stubborn and rebellious son who will not obey the voice of his father or the voice of his mother, and who when they have chastened him, will not heed them, then all the
men of his city shall stone him to death with stones" (Dt 21:18-21). Do not think that God has relaxed His rules today. It is the grace of God that sustains you and teaches you to save you from destruction. Even the New Testament proclaims death to such.
"...they disobey their parents...Although they know God's righteous decree that those who do such things deserve death" (Rom 1:30-32).

There is an unusual testimony of obedience to parents in the 35th chapter of Jeremiah. Read it.

A good start for better obedience is (1) Do not question parents; (2) Never make them repeat a request; (3) Do it as soon as they say it so that the devil's tool of forgetfulness is defeated.

Respect

It is not true respect if you uphold them only till they write their will or only as long as you need their support. When they grow old and become dependent on you, still they command respect. "Stand up in the presence of the aged, show respect for the
elderly and revere your God" (Lev 19:32). Jesus reminded a ruler to


honour his parents (Lk 18:18,20). Even if you have lost the habit of showing respect to your parents it is never too late to cultivate it again. Some very good traditional ways of showing respect to parents are being washed away by the tides of time. May
Christian parents, teach their children to hold on to good traditions. "Listen to your father who begot you, and do not despise your mother when she is old" (Prov 23:22).

Help

There is no use trying to honour your parents without helping them in some way.Atamil proverb says that a child should understand the mind of the parent and give them a helping hand before they even ask. Is there a breach between you and your parents?Are
you finding ways of getting reconciled to them? Here is a suggestion to win their love. Just start helping them in odd jobs before their asking you. You will soon realise that it is a magic wand. "As a man spares his own son who serves him" (Mal 3:17).
It is not a shame to run errands or wash dishes or sweep the floor. Jesus helped his father in carpentry and became a carpenter Himself. David took vituals for his brothers in the army and Joseph to his brothers in the field. James and John helped their father not only in the interesting job of fishing but the boring one of mending the nets too. No wonder Jesus trusted them as His helpers! You are an arrow in your father's quiver, that is, a ready help in emergency to accomplish what he will (Psa 127:4,5). Helping will help you build a healthy relationship with your parents.


Studies

What has studies to do with honouring parents? Oh yes, it has a lot to do. When you fail in the examination your parents feel dishonoured. Why? "A foolish son brings grief to his father and bitterness to the mother who bore him" (Prov 17:25). "A foolish child is a father's ruin" (Prov 19:13). How many unfortunate parents are ruined because they spend a fortune on their children to have them educated and get back no dividends! Wisdom is something to be sought after and earned. "A wise man will hear and increase learning" (Prov 1:5). In this world you may not be respected without sound education. Your parents know the value of it. Give heed to them and strive to make them happy.

If you are better educated than your parents, do not be ashamed of them before others. Never forget that they were the instruments to shape your life. Let them rejoice and be proud of you. "A man who fathers a wise son rejoices in him. May your father
and mother rejoice; may she who gave you birth be joyful!" (Prov 23:24,25).

If you have finished your studies, take up a job and support them. It is an honour and help to the family. "He who gathers crops in summer is a prudent son, but he who sleeps during harvest is a disgraceful son" (Prov 10:5).

Godliness

"The father of the righteous child has great joy" (Prov 23:24). "A discerning son heeds instruction, but a companion of gluttons disgraces his father... Whoever robs their father or mother and says: 'It's not wrong,' is a partner to one who


destroys" (Prov 28:7, 24) Have your parents warned you not to company with so and so? Give heed to them. "Listen my son to your father's instruction...if sinners entice you, do not consent. If they say: Come with us..." (Prov 1:8-11). Many many parents
are disgraced by the evil friends of children. How many innocent children who break their relationship with parents are hunted and introduced to drugs by their friends! Be wise and save yourself.

Have you stolen your parent's money or material and quietened your conscience saying it was after all yours too. No, it was not yours. Please settle accounts with them today.

When righteousness becomes a costly affair the worldly wise devise some cheaper methods to honour their parents. Jesus simply whipped at such modern morals. "You say that if anyone declares that what might have been used to help their father or mother is
'devoted to God,' they are not to 'honour their father or mother' with it
... Hypocrites!" (Mt 15:4-7). Beloved, give to Caesar that which is Caesar's, give to God that which is God's and give to your parents that which is theirs. Neither Jesus nor His Father can tolerate such outright robbery.

Unity

Unity among the children is an honour to the parents. David being one of eight sons understood it very well. Therefore he sang, "Behold, how good and how pleasant it is for brothers to dwell together in unity! It is like the precious oil upon the head" -
head of the family! (Psa 133).

Job's children are a sweet model. They had regular get-togethers. The brothers would invite their sisters, not to fight over their property but just to have a jolly good time (Job 1:4). Times of get-together are very important for a happy family. Try to join the family at every meal.Adjust your schedule to join the family prayer and fun- time. The blessing of parents is to have their children like olive trees around the table (Psa 128:3).

Unity is the strength of the family. It is very costly; maintain it at all cost. The devil will try to sow seeds of discord among the children. Memorise Matthew 5:22-24; 18:15, 21,22. A placard on your table or a sticker 70x7 will be a helpful reminder.
Read the epistles of John again and again when you start practicing brotherly love. Build up broken relationships and thus anoint your parent's head with precious ointment.

Correction

It is very scriptural for your parents to rebuke or beat you. If they do not fulfil this responsibility today, tomorow you will go to hell. It is a safeguard for you from many of the dangers unknown to you in this world. The period you are with your
parents is a time of training for your future. "It is good for a man to bear the yoke while he is young" (Lam 3:27). A yoke is painful, heavy and does not allow you to go according to your will and pleasure; but it is safe. "There is a way that appears
to be right, but in the end it leads to death" (Prov 14:12). Their corrections are God's corrections. It can be compared to God's loving corrections. "The Lord disciplines those He loves, as a father the son He delights in" (Prov
3:12). So everytime your parents correct you, remember they delight in you. Hear the New Testament believers shout from the pages of Hebrews the beautiful testimony of their saintly life: "We have all had human fathers who disciplined us and we respected
them... No discipline seems pleasant at the time but painful;

later on, however it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it" (12:9-11).

Care

The right time to repay your parents is when they are at your mercy. Old Age Homes are the offsprings of our sin of neglect of parents. David was the youngest son and yet he took the responsibility on his shoulders (1 Sam 22:3,4). No wonder everything
went well with him and he lived long on this earth and died in a good old age! Jesus provided for His mother while on the cross. "Whoever robs their father and drives out their mother is a child who bring shame and disgrace" (Prov 19:26). "If a widow has
children or grandchildren, let them first learn their religious duty to their own family and make some returns to their parents; for this is acceptable in the sight of God... If anyone does not provide for his relatives and especially for his own family,
he has disowned the faith and is worse than an unbeliever" (1 Tim 5:4, 8 RSV).

Blessing

"Anyone who curses their father or mother is to be put to death. Because they have cursed their father or mother, their blood will be on their own head" (Lev 20:9). Does some unexplained darkness in life puzzle you, and you have no guidance? Does
darkness add to darkness and drive you desperate? "If someone curses their father or mother, their lamp will be snuffed out in pitch darkness" (Prov 20:20).

"There are those who curse their fathers, and do not bless their mothers... The eye that mocks a father, that scorns an aged mother, will be pecked by the ravens of the valley, will be eaten by the vultures" (Prov 30:11, 17). Beware of swearing. Even such expressions as "I hate you" or "the old man" or "the old woman" or even a scornful utterance of a sound are to be avoided. Never accuse your parents. Learn to accept "No's" politely though painful. Do not use bad words or raise your voice against them. You have no right to lift up your hands against them, or throw things on them. Learn to control your tongue and temper when you get angry.

Conclusion

Unruly children are a sign of the last days. "There will be terrible times in the last days. People will be ... disobedient to their parents" (2 Tim 3: 1-3). Think of the prodigal son. He learnt his lesson the hard way. He thought all that he needed in life was wine, women and song. How grossly he was mistaken! It was very late when he realised that he needed his parents — but not too late. Any sin may be forgiven. But some sins will leave an indelible scar in your life. Parents are your protection from such scars. They do not want you to face unpleasant surprises, shocks and tragedies in life. If you are far away from them run into their arms. Work till the day they testify: "This is our beloved child with whom we are well pleased." When a rich young ruler confessed that he observed the commandment, Honour your father and your mother. "Then Jesus, looking at him, loved him" (Mk 10:21). So may the love of God abide with you!

  Address for Correspondence Contributions

Dr. Lilian Stanley
13 Church Colony
Vellore 632006, India
 +91 9843511943
  lilianstanley@gmail.com

Blessing Youth Mission

Blessing Youth Mission
13 Church Colony
Vellore 632006, India
 +91-416-2242943, +91-416-2248943
  hq@bymonline.org
  www.bymonline.org

For Donation & Contributions...

Home & NRE donors

Name: Blessing Youth Mission
Account Type: Current Account
A/c No.: 37268642054
Bank: State Bank of India
Branch: Siruthozhil,Vellore - 632 006
IFSC No.: SBIN0007274

Overseas Donors

Name: Blessing Youth Mission
A/c No.: 1074703964
Bank: Central Bank of India
Branch: Vellore
IFSC No.: CBIN0280887
MICR Code: 000016000
SWIFT Code: CBININBBMDR

Gulf Donors

A/c Name: T.Dickson Daniel Moses
Account Type: Saving Account
A/c No.: 35374362080
Bank: State Bank of India
Branch: Siruthozhil,Vellore - 632 006
IFSF: SBIN0007274

Click here for more options

  Blessing Literature Centre

To buy books written by Dr. Lilian Stanley, kindly reach to us in the follwing address

Blessing Literature Centre
21/11 West Coovam River Road,
Chintadripet,
Chennai 600 002, India.
 +91-44-28450411
  blc@bymonline.org